Repent

Some biblical translations of the Bible translate the Greek word “metanoia” into repent. Metanoia means a transformative change in one’s life, a turning back to God. When I think about repenting, I think about starting over, turning back, and resuming my spiritual practice. Of course, I think about the sins I committed and the regret I have for some of my actions but mostly I think about getting back on track.

I have a daily spiritual practice that I do most days. However, sometimes I quit for stupid reasons and then I find it really difficult to begin again. My practice is to say morning prayer, read the scripture for the day, and then sit and knit in silence. Knitting in silence is my method for contemplative prayer. The knitting keeps me focused, my mind in the present moment, and directed toward God. My life is so much better when I’m consistently praying every day.

I knit on this “Holy Spirit” shawl during my prayer time. It’s knit in the round with steek stitches. I used to do one row but since it is growing by 2 stitches per row, one row takes way more time than I have to give. I decided to time my knitting instead but I find the alarm disturbing. I tried just knitting until I felt that I had prayed enough but then all I could think of was stopping.

This has been going on for about two weeks. It’s time to repent, turn back toward God, and get started again. I have a bunch of suggestions in my book “Contemplative Knitting” outlining what to do when your prayer practice goes off the rails but I have found it hard to take my own advice.

I confess to all of you that my practice has lapsed. I am repenting! I have started up again and I thank you for letting me be accountable to you.

Advent is a great time to think about where we have gone off track and how we can get back on track. We all need help with this. Find a trusted person, confess, and repent. I’ll be praying for you.

Published by Julie Cicora

I'm an Episcopal Priest that loves using knitting as a spiritual discipline.

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